We got to talking about other possible job opportunities for the police officer who became RoboCop. If I remember the plot right (no, I’m not going to spend even a nanosecond reviewing the plot of RoboCop on Wikipedia), all of officer Murphy’s limbs were damaged beyond repair and replaced with robotic parts when he became RoboCop. But, what if they had given him a choice between making him into RoboCop or just leaving him with (probably) no limbs?

We didn’t actually discuss the context for our reasoning. So I feel the need to say that these options only apply to the severely injured officer Murphy of the Detroit Police Department. I think it is safe to say that the Detroit portrayed in the movie basically had three kinds of people: cops, criminals, and victims. Given that limited set of employment opportunities, we decided the injured officer Murphy’s career choices come down to the following:

• He decides to let the fancy doctors who cuss a lot make him into RoboCop.
• He becomes an extra in porn movies (“I’m just here to watch”).

Other, less viable options such as paperweight, children’s toy, and giant drain plug were immediately dismissed or not said aloud during the discussion. As I type this, I think voice-over actor is another possibility. I remember there being a lot of television in RoboCop. So that is a viable option for a guy with the voice of officer Murphy. I bet you could make a pretty cool cartoon character with the catch phrase, “Dead or alive, you’re coming with me.”

So, there you go. Other viable career opportunities for the injured officer Murphy. We discussed this. For awhile. For far longer than anyone should discuss the merits of a limbless Detroit police officer acting as an extra in a porn.

I’m so going to hell for this.

Update: corrected spelling (caps on the C) of “RoboCop”; corrected spelling of “sergeant” and then removed it because I couldn’t find proof officer Murphy was actually a sergeant.

This afternoon, as I did the customary, bi-monthly task of sorting through the giant pile of mail that resides on a table near our front door, I decided enough was enough. I’m done with paper-wasting. Done with the environmental consequences of having useless information — information I have not solicited — delivered to me at the expense of living organisms. Done with the volume of paper that I neither read nor feel the need to pass on to others going straight into the recycle bin without so much as a second glance.

So, I hit up my friend, The Internet, for some ideas on how to reduce my paper mail footprint. The Internet, as always, came through. Here are a few ideas for reducing your paper mail (and thus your carbon) footprint.

Direct Marketing

The Direct Marketing Association has a website, dmachoice.org where you can opt-out of their mailing lists. Since their mailing lists account for most unsolicited catalogs and other mailed advertisements, this action alone can reduce your volume of unsolicited mail significantly. The process is pretty simple: you create an account and opt-out. Done. You can change your preferences at any time, so if you ever want to go back to proxy-slaughtering trees, you can ;-).

One aspect of this process I found amusing was the DMA’s reasoning that you should not opt-out of their mailings because you’ll be harming the environment. On the confirmation page, they warn that, if you don’t receive paper catalog mailers, you’ll just get in your car and drive to the mall. As opposed to not receiving a paper catalog, not getting in my car, and just shopping online and getting better prices? You lost me.

If you’re hooked on some of the catalogs you get already but want to opt-out of the mailings you haven’t asked for, you can try catalogchoice.org. Catalog Choice gives you more granular control over what you get and don’t get, allowing you to unsubscribe to individual catalogs.

Credit Card Offers

In my search to remove myself from the paper nightmare of direct marketing, I discovered that you can also opt-out of pre-screened credit card offers. AWESOME! optoutprescreen.com is a website setup by the Consumer Credit Reporting Industry to allow you to remove yourself from pre-screened credit card offers. Again, the process is simple although it requires more sensitive information: your Social Security number and a valid credit card. This is information they already have and they use it to verify your identity. I wasn’t quite comfortable giving that information out, so I did some poking around and found an article from AARP Magazine recommending optoutprescreen.com. I thought that was a trustworthy endorsement, so I signed up. You can opt-out of pre-screened credit card offers for 5-years or for life. In order to opt-out for life, you have to sign a form and mail it in. I will sacrifice a little paper now to save reams of paper later.

I’m hoping that these two actions alone will reduce my paper mail footprint by more than 90%. In addition, I have all of my bills sent to me via email now and only receive paper bills from a couple of companies. Please pass on any other ideas to reduce your paper mail footprint. I’d love to hear more.

We now know that Gonzales, McNulty and Moschella each lied to Congress. We know that the purge was a plan that began at the White House — and it was overseen by two of President Bush’s closest lieutenants in Washington — Miers and Gonzales. Sampson is the second resignation. There will certainly be more.

Despicable human beings. Cowardly protecting their own interests at the expense of our Democracy.

According to the post on Digg, this is a Swiss town after an ice storm. Although living there day to day would probably be a huge hassle, I do think it would be awesome to be there and experience something like this.

I’d probably do all kinds of experiments on the frozen cars with hot water and a chisel. I bet some cool artwork can come from this. Beside the cool artwork nature already created.

Check it out. Globalne ocieplenie zaatakowało

Update: The linked page here was apparently on a site with limited bandwidth that has now gone down. Luckily Digg mirrors popular sites. So you can see the images after all.

One such example is ThickBox. Thickbox is a Javascript tool that allows images and HTML content to be displayed in a virtual “lightbox” right in the current browser window without refreshing the page, sending the user to a different page, or popping up a new page. The effect is so sweet, it’ll rock your boots.

We’ve been itching to use this on several of our clients’ sites. But, as with all tools, it is best to use things for the right purpose and not simply because they are cool. This being my personal site, I’m free to use gratuitous displays of Javascript coolness with reckless abandon.

Try it out.